Support Your Dad

Creak reporting from the frontlines of Operation: Plush Toy Freedom. I've been embedded in my mobile dog house for about a week now because things have been stalled by our lack of finding anything conclusive, but we'll push on soon enough. At any rate, I thought it was time to relax a little bit, calm down about things and settle down with some of my favorite books. Unfortunately, I forgot most of my classics back on my side of street, so I had to borrow one from some reporter I happened upon. She was a little low of my particular brand of literature, but I was able to glean a few true works of greatness from her collection. There were also a few strange ones that left me thinking.

For example, one children's oriented book seemed simple enough, but it kind of had me itching myself for a little bit. I'll see how much of it I've remembered, but the old memory just isn't what it used to be, so bear with me. Remember, this is a children's book, so it's pretty advanced, try and keep up. The title was Support Your Dad.

"Johnny is a good boy. He loves his parents and they love him. Johnny's dad is named Sam. One time, Johnny saw his dad get in a fight with another man. The other man's name was Muhammad. This fight scared Johnny. His dad got hurt. Since then, Johnny has always known to be a good boy because his dad needs his support. So Johnny always listens to his dad. Johnny used to be good friends with his neighbor, Jacques. But Jacques' father is friends with Muhammad. Johnny's dad doesn't like Muhammad, so Johnny is a good boy and doesn't talk to Jean anymore. Johnny's sister Mary is a bad girl. She saw her dad fight with Muhammad, but she still is friends with Jacques. Johnny and Mary's dad, Sam knows that Johnny is a good boy, and Mary is a bad girl. So every night when Johnny and Mary have ice cream, Johnny gets chocolate syrup. Johnny loves chocolate syrup. He loves how it trickles down the right side of his rich ice cream. Johnny is so happy! Mary is so sad. So always be a good boy or girl, so you can get extra rich dessert!"

Anyway, what really left me wondering about it was how Jacques was such a bad guy, he was just trying not to get involved in another insane fight. I mean, that would only perpetuate hostilities, right? Seems like I did miss something here - hold on, looks like something may have turned up over at von Loud's. I better go check that out, with a little bit of luck it will be some damn proof. Creak out.