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Friends with Problems
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
I feel frustrated. My friends are not warming to my boyfriend and it's getting annoying.
What should I do?
-Tara in Tempe
Dear Tara,
For many, it's a rite of passage having their friends not welcome significant others. The younger you are, the less it matters -- for all you know, these friends could be reacting to your now reduced attention.
Best method for progress: have your boyfriend spend time with you and your friends ... going bowling, grabbing coffee -- anything low-key and low-stress.
If he is a good guy, they'll see it.
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
My best friend just told me she's attracted to my husband.
What do I do?
-Run-down Rhoda
Dear Rhoda,
It's a matter of trust. If your friend has a kind heart, she may have trusted you enough to share this potentially embarrassing admission. And that's all it was -- with no ulterior motives or desires behind it.
However, trust your gut. If you have reason to distrust this friend -- or your husband -- keep a watchful eye. Communicate with both. Nip any problems in the bud before they spiral out of control.
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
A really good friend of mine is sad, like, all the time. He seems to be getting worse.
Recently he moved away from home and I'm only able to talk to him over the phone, or online.
How can I help?
-Boise Bill
Dear Bill,
A big move can throw any sane person out of whack. Be sure to give him time to adjust (anywhere from weeks to months).
Remind him of the things he loved to do before the move -- going for a run, going to the theatre, riding rollercoasters, reading good books, whatever it may have been. He may be too overwhelmed to remember these activities.
Make sure he knows you're there to help any way you can. Listen to what he has to say.
If he continues to worsen, share with him your concern and suggest he find someone in his new city with whom to talk (a therapist, pastor, rabbi ... someone he trusts).
Have a question for Ms. Meniscus? Submit it below. She looks forward to hearing from you!
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