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In-Laws, Ex-es, and Tongue Piercings
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
My son-in-law is taking advantage of my daughter. She has OA and hyper-mobility, and they share two little girls, 2 1/2 and 1 years old. He expects her to do everything and take the little ones along with her all the time. Am I being unreasonable in wanting to yell at him to get off his lazy butt?
-Miffed Mum
Dear Miffed,
You are not being unreasonable in wanting to yell at your son-in-law. No, no, your anger is perfectly justified in that she is your daughter and you are her mother and you are therefore incensed by her husband's postulated disregard for her illness. But yelling is, at best, a short-term palliative measure that only antagonizes the issue at hand. To yell, or even eloquently chime, at your son-in-law to "get off his lazy butt" would be an unsolicited outburst, given that you are not the one married to him. Consider this: your daughter not only has a disease - she has the unchallenged authority over the way she expects to be treated by others. If her husband is being unkind, then it is her vocal cords to be strained, not yours. Unless you wrote without hyperbole and the situation is truly dire (read: domestic abuse), Ms. Meniscus prophets a more satisfactory resolution if you stay uninvolved.
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
How do I tell my ex-boyfriend that I still like him? You see, we went out for a while, and during that time, one of my "friends" told him that I deserved better and was pretty mean to him, so he broke up with me. I still like him a lot, and it's been almost a year, but I can't get over him. I think I'm in love with him. How do I go about asking him back out? When I'm with him, everything feels so perfect.
-Clueless
Dear Clue,
See the phone, love? Over there to the left. No, a little more... Right, there you go. Now pick up the receiver and dial your honey's number. Ask if he'd like to catch a movie with you. No, not "Bubble Boy"! No! See "The Others". Yes, good. Have fun on your date. Reminisce on the good times. Catch up on the present. Don't come back home too late. And let Ms. Meniscus know how it turns out.
Dear Ms. Meniscus,
I got my tongue pierced a week ago, and I really like it. It is the only thing I have pierced, and it is a very subtle accessory. My parents are visiting me at college in one month, and I haven't told them about the piercing yet. I'm not quite sure what their reaction will be. Should I tell them? Should I try to conceal the piercing? Help.
-Impaled
Dear Impaled,
You crazy kids. Well, if the Aztecs, the Mayas, and Sporty Spice can do it, I suppose that you can, too. It is a personal decision to have a steel barbell impaled through your tongue, and it is a personal decision to divulge this tidbit of self-mutilation to relatives. If you feel your parents can handle the piercing, then tell them in a simple and conversational matter. Explain to them that, unlike marijuana or motorcycles, the jewelry is not a gateway to more rebellious, dangerous things. On the other hand, it is also perfectly rational to conceal the piercing, as it might easily offend family members, employers, and small children. Purchase a flesh-colored tongue retainer, which lays flat on the tongue and is virtually imperceptible to probing mothers. Be safe, and gargle.
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