Strippers and Family Problems

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

In May of 2000, I met a male stripper at one of the local strip clubs. My girlfriends and I would occasionally visit him again at the club, and we became really close friends. It's been almost two years, and I feel like I'm in love with him. Whenever I went to the club, he treated me like I was the only one he wanted near him. We even exchanged numbers. He has a girlfriend, but he says he still loves me. I don't know if I should believe that. He is always on my mind, and I can't have fun with other guys without thinking of him. What should I do about our relationship? Why do I think like this? Please help.

-Grin and Bare It

Dear Bare,

I am not familiar with the stripping profession, but I believe a male stripper's job description entails not only stripping but wooing lustful, saucer-eyed women. Is it possible, then, that you've merely fallen under the spell of a particularly bewitching and beguiling buck? Ms. Meniscus can practically see you shaking your head in emphatic denial. If you really want to pursue this gentleman, slip an invitation to dinner - not a wad of singles - into the band of his g-string. The only way your relationship with him can progress is if you spend quality time with each other in an atmosphere that doesn't include a pole. Should the stripper decline your invite, finish your Screwdriver, leave the club, and meet a nice orthodontist or something. Best of luck!

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

I have been married for 20 years to my husband. I have many health problems, so I don't work outside the house. My husband recently had serious surgery (if he didn't, he would have become a quadriplegic). He is currently off from work, of course, and his family has been nice to him and offered some monetary support. Despite their being kind to him, they have completely turned against me. They resent me for not working and have actually implied that I should be the one in the hospital bed. My husband is not aware of this, and I'm trying hard not to lash out at his family. The stress is just too much to work with, and I can't stop crying. How can I learn to forget the nasty comments my husband's family says to me?

-Stressed and Upset

Dear Upset,

You're dealing with a lot of stress. If anything, that much is obvious. Your husband is recovering from major surgery. He is not able to work at the moment. You are sick yourself and unable to hold a job. The bills are piling up, and on top of that, your husband's family is constructing an oven in which they expect you to place your head. How they have saddled you with blame and guilt is beyond my understanding. My advice is to avoid contact with his family and continue business as usual. Your husband needs not only monetary support, but companionship and kindness, too. Ignore their comments and recognize that being a patient, caring wife is harder than any occupation I am familiar with.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

Currently, my boyfriend and I are in a "break." We've been dating for a year and a half, and my mother and sister have treated him terribly since day one. I have done my best to make him feel better about this, but he says he can't take it anymore. I do not talk to my sister because of this, and I'm just barely able to tolerate my mother. I love my boyfriend very much and I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with him. What can I do to get them to leave us alone?

-Torn

Dear Torn,

In my experience, I've found that people generally do not treat other individuals poorly without reason. What is it about your boyfriend that incenses your mother and sister? Is he on parole? Does he not believe in god? Does he wear white after Labor Day? Some of these reasons may be more valid than others, but they can be effective bones of contention, nonetheless. In other words, your mother and sister have their reasons for disliking your boyfriend, and any effort on your part probably won't change this.

After years of weathering your mother's tirades, you can probably dismiss her disapproval as just another one of her rants. As for your boyfriend, he won't be able to look past it so easily. If forced to choose between your family and your boyfriend, think carefully. Ms. Meniscus is no oracle and cannot predict what danger lurks beyond the fork in the

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