Love and Marriage and Knees

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

I have this boyfriend, who is ten and a half years older than me. We just got engaged, and i don't know how to tell my parents that we're even together. My parents have both met him, and they like him. I'm not sure how they would react when I tell them what's going on. I've been seeing him for seven months, and i don't want to tell them until after we've been together for a year, because i'll be eighteen by then. I think my mother has figured it out, whereas my father is oblivious. How do I handle this? My mother thinks that someone two years older than me is too old.

-Scarlet E

Dear Scarlet E,

Other readers have written similar questions regarding the age issue. Though Ms. Meniscus usually advocates honesty and forthright behavior, in your situation, she believes that your inclination to wait a while to inform your parental unit is probably wise. Not only would it be wise in terms of your aging process, but also because Ms. Meniscus is sure that there are countless more wonderful attributes to discover in your beau. In seven months, it is doubtful that all of those wonders were revealed. Likewise, if you are seventeen years old, there is much left to experience and discover in the world--such as graduation from high school, for example, before "growing up." Don't begin wearing the Scarlet "E" on your chest just yet. There is no reason to rush through such hallmarks as engagements and weddings. Such events should be joyful, and--timely.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

My boyfriend and I were doing great. Then a day later he gives me a note (in another girl's handwriting)and says he doesn't like me anymore and wants to break up. Also that same week my friend told me that she saw him flirting with some other girl, and when I spoke to him about it he swore he doesn't like anyone else and that he still likes me. Some of my friends think he was cheating on me and the other half doesn't think so. I hear he's very loyal and that he wouldnt play if his life depended on it.What should I do ? Should I go back with him if he asks?

-Confused

Dear Confused,

Ms. Meniscus advises that it shouldn't matter what your friends think, or what circulates on the rumor mill--for example, you "hear he's very loyal." If you're going to date the boy, you yourself should know whether this fact is fabricated or not, firsthand. Typically, true loves do not offer up notes of rejection written by another girl. Clearly your "boyfriend" shouldn't be considered as such if he apparently enjoys playing with your emotions in such a fashion. Ms. Meniscus suggests that you revel in independence, freedom, and single status for a while before you even begin to consider whether the numerous labors of love he'll have performed in the interim are enough to win back your heart.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

I'm looking at having bilateral knee joint replacements early December. Scared to death. Any help?

-Scared of Surgery

Dear Scared of Surgery,

Ms. Meniscus must admit that she herself has never had bilateral knee joint replacements. But she knows someone who has, and that surgery was quite successful. Though the process was, to be frank, trying for the individual in question, the surgery relieved the constant pain to which she had become accustomed. Moreover, the replacements allowed her, after the requisite "rest" period, to become active again. Simply taking a leisure walk had been a forgotten memory; with her new knee joints, life was once again walkable. In essence, mon ami, Ms. Meniscus understands your apprehension but seeks to reassure you that the endeavor will most likely improve quality of life.

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