Pregnant in Podunksville, My Ulnar is Tingling, and Cheesy Son-In-Laws

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

I've been with my bf for a year and a half. We were really good in the beginning and I never heard anything around town negative about him not being true to me. Our relationship isn't as good as it use to be and we've kind of separated and got back together, but we both agreed that we were still together even when we separated. I recently heard he hooked up with someone else. I ask him about it and of course he totally denies it. But he is always making white lies to me over stupid things that he really doesn't need to lie to me about. I ask him why he lies over small things and he says its because he doesn't want to make me mad (even though I wouldn't be so mad if he just would tell me the truth) the reason why I'm so frustrated with it all is because I'm pregnant with his baby. If I wasn't, I would just move on and get over him. Just tonight my guy friend and I were arguing and he got mad at me and out of the blue said, "too bad I've pimped girls with your boyfriend" We weren't even talking about my boyfriend. I was so hurt. I don't know whom to believe. when I confront my boyfriend on things people say, he always says" are you going to believe other people or me?" I know in my small town a lot of people gossip, but I don't know who to believe. Why would I be hearing things about him when he never hears bad things like that about me? Oh and he's always asking me what guys I've talked to because he thinks I'm going to cheat on him. He's a very jealous guy over everything and he's disrespected me in many ways. What should I think of this?

-Lost in Podunksville

Dear Lost,

Honey, you just laid out an entire case against your boyfriend, so Ms. Meniscus is thinking that you really already know what "think of this" and him. He isn't nice to you, he's jealous, he's cheated on you, he lies to you. Normally that would simply be definite dumping grounds. The situation is complicated because he has impregnated you, unfortunately, and now you are stuck in the position of whether or not to stay with him just because he is the father. It is easy for Ms. Meniscus to say run, and run fast from this undesirable, but Ms. Meniscus in not in your shoes. Whatever you decide to do, please keep in mind some self-respect and self-esteem, and don't offer yourself as a doormat for his dirty boots.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

After telling my medical student friend about my hand having strange syptoms, he told me that he thinks that it is Ulnar Tunnel Syndrome, and that it was a type of arthritis. Could you explain what that is?

-UTS Happening

Dear UTS,

Most people are familiar with carpal tunnel syndrome, which can cause numbness and tingling in the hand. Ulnar tunnel syndrome can cause numbness and tingling that is confined to your little finger and the outside of your ring finger. Unlike carpal tunnel syndrome, however, ulnar tunnel syndrome is not usually caused by repetitive motions. The ulnar nerve is one of three major nerves that provide sensation and motor function to the hand. It runs down the inside of your forearm to the heel of your hand. Then it branches out across the palm and into the little and ring fingers. Excessive pressure on this nerve can result in a loss of feeling and/or muscle weakness in the hand. You may experience pain and numbness, sensory or motor changes or both, depending on the location of the pressure point. Treatment depends on what's causing the pressure on the nerve. Please consult your doctor to make sure the problem receives proper medical attention.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

My son-in-law is verbally and emotionally abusive to our daughter. They have three small children and they both work. We do not live in the same state and when we visit, he is rude, sullen and gets angry and does not treat her lovingly. I have tried to support her yet the treatment is unbearable for me to know what she and her children are dealing with. What can I do? I have even thought of moving to their city so I can support and help care for the children also. I am concerned our daughter and children are not living in a peaceful, safe environment. I have tried to talk to her, but she is always making excuses. She is in denial as to how bad it is I feel. What should I do without making myself crazy with worry?

-Worried in Wisconsin

Dear Worried,

This is a serious situation indeed, and unfortunately the psychology with people in abusive situations cannot be helped by the average joe wanting to step in and save the day. Ms. Meniscus recommends that you try to persuade your daughter and her husband to see a counselor or psychiatrist. It is possible professional help will aid your son-in-law's problems. If it does not, all you can do is try to be make your daughter understand the gravity of the situation. It might be ideal for her if you moved nearby to help out, but it would not be healthy for you (and ultimately, it isn't healthy for her to ignore the serious problems at home).

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