Joe vs. The Volcano

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

My husband has been married before and has a son. I think it's wonderful, except for his ex-wife, who is the biggest "witch" you could imagine. She is always trying to cancel or turn down visitations, and this is very frustrating. How can my husband and I get along like normal when she is always making life stressful for us?

-Stressed out Second

Dear SoS,

Families can be very messy, especially given the complications of first and second spouses. H.L. Mencken once said that bigamy is having one wife too many--and so is monogamy. Perhaps he was referring to your husband's first wife, the biggest "witch" outside Oz. Ms. Meniscus advises that you and your husband get in legal writing your specific rights to visitation. If the ex does not comply, a lawyer can speak to her about this behavior. She probably wants to avoid court, and probably wants to hang onto this child, so chances are that she'll be more agreeable when pressed by the law. As for you and your husband, you just have to try your best to remember that this woman's intention is to make life difficult and unhappy for you. Don't let her succeed--take events with a grain of salt (or pepper).

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

I am 15 years old and it's this boy that's been trying to get with me for about a year and something. I finally gave him the time of day and said we can talk and be friends and stuff because I really started liking him. I gave him my number and we stared calling each other and seeing each other so our relationship grew and we became closer and closer. After we then got used to being around each other and talking to each other, we both let loose and started telling each other how we really felt about each other. Everyday we talked to each other and most of the time we saw each other. I know I am young and some people may think that it's just a little phase that I'm going through cause to tell you the truth I felt like I was in love with this boy but I don't think I was, maybe it felt like that because I really liked him. Well, he is 17 years old and he was hanging out with the wrong crowd and got put out of DC public schools so it was time for him to go to job court and before he went he went to take pictures with his ex-girlfriend. Since he found out that I knew what he did he didn't call me since. He came from job court on the christmas break and he called my best friend and told her that he really like me and that he didn't think a picture can do so much and that I am the only girl he ever bonded with the way that we bonded. He also said that he was scared to call me because he know that he messed up and he wanted to apologized but he does know how I will react. Ms.Meniscus I still really like him and it's not because he tells me what I want to hear but it's because he's nice and a gentleman and he is very respectful. I know he messed up and did something that wasn't right so if he wants to get back with me, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

-Out of the Picture

Dear Out of the Picture,

Ms. Meniscus is simply loathe to believe he had the audacity to take pictures with this ex-girlfriend personage. What was he thinking? What will he think of next? Is nothing sacred anymore? This is all to convey that Ms. Meniscus has no idea what sort of pictures you may mean, or what the connotations of this act may be. But obviously his behavior really bothered you, so the pictures must certainly have been heinous in one fashion or another. Dear me. If you still like him very much and want to be with him, then Ms. Meniscus believes that you've answered your own question. If he wants to "get back with [you]," and you're agreeable to this notion, then the best thing you can do is speak to him directly about the aforementioned pictures. Perhaps he does not recognize the extent of his transgression, or perhaps he does, and will grovel at your feet, bring you tulips and daffodils every day from now on through eternity, and write poetry in tribute to your beauty.

Dear Ms. Meniscus,

hmm do i hafta choose?

well, I have an absolutely awesome boyfriend who I get along with most of the time and we are like best friends... but well see that's the problem my real best friends do not like that at all. My friends get real upset when he is around because they say I focus on him too much and that I ignore them. It is so hard to be put in a position where your friends say choose. They seem to like having girls only nights all of a sudden. I fall in love and my friends wish that me and him break up. I don't know what to do. He never puts that pressure on me so of course I would enjoy being with him while my friends make me feel like I'm being tested on our friendship all the time. Why can't I just be happy with my friends and my boyfriend without feeling pressured?

-Stuck in the Middle

Dear Stuck,

Well, it is really up to you whether you feel happy with your friends and boyfriend or whether you feel pressured. Maybe your friends are correct in their assessment, and maybe they are ridiculously astray. Ultimately only you can decide how you want to spend your time and with whom. Any further questions? Speak to Romeo and Juliet.

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